I stole a toothbrush from the Chilean Ambassador
I was at the dentist’s office, sitting in the chair having just completed my cleaning. As they always send you off with a replacement toothbrush, for some reason I did something I never do, and decided I would brush my teeth right then and there while waiting for my post-cleaning consult.
Using the same minty paste the hygienist had just used to polish my teeth–I don’t know how I got my hands on it–I was enthusiastically scrubbing my molars before quickly realizing: one, that I was not alone in the room; and two, this was not my toothbrush.
I became aware that to my left was another chair, closer to the floor, more intended for someone to wait in, like you might see in a hospital room. Sitting in it was a dark-haired gentlemen presumably waiting for his own cleaning, and I realized that the turqoise and yellow toothbrush I was holding was in fact his, which he’d placed on the counter when he came in the room. A detail I somehow knew already, but for some reason only registered after the fact that it was now in my mouth.
Realizing my misstep, I quickly hopped over to the sink in the room to do a hasty rinse-and-spit and put the toothbrush down, and returned to awkwardly own up to this man for taking his toothbrush.
What I realized though as I approached him was that I recognized him as Roberto Ampuero- the Chilean novelist and former ambassador to Mexico and Minister of Foreign Affairs- who I’d taped a video interview with in 2011 or so as part of a series of interviews I produced for the Iowa City UNESCO City of Literature around that time.
Part of the reason I didn’t recognize Mr. Ampuero is that he had been wearing a black baseball cap when he came in, like you might see a celebrity wear when they try to go out incognito. But seeing him now it was unmistakably him, and I was struck by his youthful appearance, having been some 14 or so years since I’d last seen him.
I apologized profusely, but he was as magnanimous as I remember him the first time we met–assuring me that my error was of no harm, a simple and laughable mistake. While he didn’t recall me from our first encounter, he quickly pivoted to asking me who I was, how was I doing, etc., as was his gracious way of dealing with people, and I was prepared to remind him of our interview, and also I wanted to ask him why he hadn’t seemed to age at all in the intervening years. Only then did I realize I was not in fact at the dentist’s office at all, of course, but in a lucid dream in the wee hours of the morning, from which I woke up instantly, realizing it was 5:20am.
Because I seldom remember my dreams after waking up, and because it has happened to me in the past, it occured to me this anomaly may have been diet-related. The night before was Halloween, and as was my habit I’d stocked up on a variety of sweets in preparation for neighborhood trick-or-treaters; but as it was an especially cold and windy night this year, I only had a couple visits to the door.
While I waited mostly in vain, I unwisely ate three miniature 100 Grand bars, which, while not that much is still approximately 300% more chocolate than I typically consume in a day. And as has happened to me more than once in my life, the extra dose of sugar apparently messed with my REM sleep later, and likely fueled my oneiric encounter with the ambassador.
So while I was on the one hand disappointed I didn’t actually run into Mr. Ampuero again, it was a relief to realize I didn’t steal his toothbrush after all, and nice to be reminded of how much I enjoyed our interview–which I’m sharing below. It was also funny to be reminded of the effect that chocolate can sometimes have on me. Maybe I should eat some candy at night a little more often, and see who else I may encounter.
